THE STUPIDITY OF HORROR MOVIES. OK, let's take Brian Yuzna's Sequel of the Sequel of the original Return of the living Dead. I read some critics about that movie before I finally decided to go and watch this flick. The reviews statet that there's basically a love story and some gore effects - but not too many to qualify for a decent zombie flick.
It all begins with the credit sequence where you can see in the big letters of the actors names that there's something gory going on, well it seems that there are needles and chaines going thru flesh - a piercing procedure. Very tricky and it sets the tone for the movie. Then the plot (a plot with huge holes) officially begins and takes us to a military base where they do experiments with dead people. The aim is to use these corpses as biochemical weapons (hey and you don't need batteries). The dead people are resurrected with some kind of biogas. Side effect is these undead creatures are really strong, eat human flesh and prefer human brain more than caviar.
The experiment goes terribly wrong (what a huge suprise !) and a few employees are biten and turn rapidly into zombies. Witness of this desaster is young Curt, son of the project's header and his girlfriend Julie (Mindy Clarke) who managed to get into this high security military base. HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE ? I mean military is doing some very very very secret 'for your eyes only' experiments with dead bodies bringing them back to life and two teenagers get access to the building with one security card Curt stole from his father? Are you kidding ? So after various splatter effects the teenies escape from the base. Being home again Curt has an argument with his father and leaves angry with his girlfriend on the motorcycle. As it is written in the script they crash against a tree and the girl brecks her neck. The boy thinks: "Oh my god I still have my fathers access card... why don't go back and let my dead girl inhale some biogas that she's living again. I don't think that she will be an evil flesh-eater. Not my girl."
He gets back to the military base - no one prevents him from doing so. His girl gets some gas - she returns from the dead but there's no heart - beat and the extremities are numb. But, oh my god there's another zombie in the box and it is hungry! So some stupid security guys loose their head (and brains) and the sweet couple escape again from the military base. Julie is hungry too, but doesn't know what happens with her (this transformation into a zombie is slow) so she bites a guy at the shop around the corner. Bad enough that they get into some trouble with the friends of the guy who has been biten. So the couple is on the run from the military and from these angry Spanish guys. The guy with the bite is getting ill, but his friends don't take him to the hospital. No he must join the others in the sewers to chase the couple. These are true friends!
The girl is desperate, she wants to kill herself and jumps from the bridge. Of course she is dead and can't kill herself 'cos she is already dead, right ? She get's more hungry, but doesn't want to have her boyfriend for dinner so she tortures herself 'cos pain makes the appetite for human flesh go away. Although she is then pierced all over the body (nails, chains, glass etc... remember the credit sequence) but still hungry. Her mood constantly changes from innocent girlie to naughty bitch and otherwise. So she eats some more brain - from a guy who helped them to hide in the sewers. That's what she must have learned from her mother: Be always thankful and show some respect. The military with Curt's father suddenly appears in the sewers and they kill the group of (earlier human now) Spanish zombies (remember when you get biten by a Zombie you become a Zombie yourself like when a vampire bites you you become a vampire or when a werwolf bites you you become a werwolf).
By the way, the boy is still in love with his zombie girl. That is true love. "My girlfriend feeds on human flesh and looks like shit with all that metal spread over her face and body but I still like her". Well the movie could easily end here. Well I hoped so. There was enough blood spattered and people killed and eaten by now. But Yuzna must have felt that he owes his hardcore fans and the end is just a disgusting bloody manslaughter fest with more stupid military guys being turned into zombies.
Where has the dark humour gone? I couldn't find any. The movie takes itself too serious. The love story is second, gore effects are first. And way too much and way too explicit for my taste. If you see Romero's original b/w flick NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD you can easily experience a scary zombie movie without far too explicit gore effects. Story matters. And Romero focused on the conflict between black and white people and how they interact in extreme situations where they should stick together rather than pick on each other. There's also a criticism of how scientists use their knowledge.